


i have a memory (back at that party)

by lenalufor



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - No Powers, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Abuse, implied/referenced eating disorder
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-25
Updated: 2018-06-25
Packaged: 2019-05-28 16:03:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,691
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15052838
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lenalufor/pseuds/lenalufor
Summary: kara and lena meet as children, at lex's birthday party. lillian isn't the nicest mother to lena, and kara can't help but be mad about it. always quick to right a wrong, she shares her cake with a forlorn looking girl.years later, they meet again - and thanks to a pilfered sheet cake, a friendship starts.or, kara and lena meet and fall in love over cake au.





	i have a memory (back at that party)

**Author's Note:**

> i haven't watched this show since season two, but i come back to my old works all the time and think about posting them. i had this written over a year ago, but kept tweaking and changing little things ever since, and it never felt right. i don't think it'll ever be perfect or exactly what i want it to be, so i figured i'd just post it like it is so I don't keep fussing over it.
> 
> so here's this weird au where kara and lena meet as kids and then eat cake together over and over again, because kara's sentimental like that. 
> 
> (ps: this fic happened because I got really overwhelmed listening to "all over her" by salvia palth for the millionth time so I recommend giving it a listen while you read.)

The first time they met was at a birthday party.

Kara had never been to one without grownups before, and she knew it was meant to be a brave new step, but that only made her nervous.

She was still unsure and unstable in her new home. Mortality and loss were big concepts for a child to grasp, especially for an eight year old that had lost most of her family in a fire. It made her stick to Clark like glue, and she rarely left the Danvers household unattended. 

Largely in part to the whole ordeal, Kara was a quiet thing that often kept to herself - so much so that the kids her own age didn't invite her to parties. 

So Eliza had asked Clark to take her along, and he'd done so, begrudgingly. Lex was turning thirteen, and Clark knew that it wasn't cool to have a kid tag along with him. 

Still, he had a soft spot for her. He tried to be strong for them after the fire, both of them helpless when the flames had taken everything from them. Clark was too aware that he was her only living family, and he took that role seriously.

He understood, and with his own fears set aside, he tugged the little girl along to the Luthors' door like the big brother he wanted to be. 

Lex's family lived on the nice side of town. It hadn't always been that way, but Clark said that they had "come into money", whatever that meant. 

Apparently it meant that their mother wore a lot of perfume, and she didn't like Kara's secondhand Chucks, dirtied and scuffed by Alex, now clumsy on Kara's feet. Kara had frowned when she was asked to take them off at the door, but Clark had whispered that it was something they all had to do, that it wasn't personal. 

They'd been ushered into the living room, where a handful of rowdy boys crowded around the television. Lex explained the new game to them - it was a prototype that his father had brought home, from one of his friends in the tech industry. 

The boys were enthralled, and they wouldn’t let Kara see, muttering things about video games being for boys. 

So she sat quietly while they played, until a bored looking girl about Alex's age wandered in. Her hair was short, and her dress was crisp and lacy and pretty. Clark had explained that Lex had a little sister - he'd even suggested that they might get to play together - and Kara guessed that it must have been her. 

She looked surprised when she saw Kara tucked into a corner of the sofa opposite the boys - and she actually smiled at her before she announced that it was time for cake.

The boys scrambled up as soon as the round was over, clambering toward the kitchen for dessert. Kara waited patiently for Clark to grab her hand, and they trailed in behind the small crowd. 

Kara had never seen a cake so huge. It was the nice kind they made in the ice cream shops, with toy figures and a cartoon decorated on top. The boys talked about which character was their favorite, and Mrs. Luthor looked at them pointedly when she placed the figures in a box. 

They sang happy birthday, and Kara did her best not to squirm as she waited for the plates to be handed out. 

Her plate arrived last, and she nearly had a bite to her mouth when the girl approached the table and made to grab a slice. 

Kara wouldn't have noticed the exchange at all if Mrs. Luthor hadn't been so mean. Her fingers wrapped around the young girl's wrist and she moved her hand away from the plate. 

"Lena," she hissed what Kara figured was the girl's name. It sounded scary, especially because she never knew moms could sound like that.

"We talked about this…you had two slices of pizza earlier," Mrs. Luthor scolded her, and Lena's arm fell limply at her side. 

Kara was too young to really understand what it meant, but she knew it wasn't right. She wanted to tell Lex's mom that there was a whole cake right there. She wanted to tell her that she'd eaten two slices too, all on her own, but she still had room for cake - so Lena would, too. 

Her fear got the better of her, though, and Kara sat quietly and watched them talk instead. 

The tone was hushed, but not enough that she didn't pick up on it. Lena looked stricken when her mother was done, and something twisted in Kara's gut. She didn't like it, and she waited until the mean woman disappeared before she approached the older girl. 

"Here, you can have mine," she said clearly, her voice the loudest and steadiest it had been in months. Her small fingers held the plate out, a smile on her face. "I ate a lot of pizza, I've got no room," she added, when Lena seemed unsure. 

"Thank you." she whispered, a distant tone to her voice as she took the plate. 

Kara felt good as she watched Lena eat - though it made her a bit sad each time she'd glance at the door, checking that her mother wouldn't walk back in. She tried to distract her instead, told Lena her name and why she was there, how Clark thought he was a grown up now just because he was a teenager. 

It made Lena laugh, and Kara thought her mom would be proud if she could see it. 

She didn't even care that she had given up her favorite kind of cake - not when Lena gave her that small, thankful smile when she handed the empty plate back. 

Kara just sat with it in front of her instead and let the giggle rumble through her when Mrs. Luthor walked back in with Lex's gifts. She couldn't even tell that they'd tricked her, and Kara felt a thrill when she collected the trash from the children, none the wiser. 

They said their goodbyes after the presents were opened, and Lena seemed surprised at the fierceness in the scrawny girl's hug. 

When they got home, Kara ate the two extra slices Clark was given - three would have been nice, but giving away the first one was worth it. 

\---------

Kara saw her again at a high school graduation party, what seemed like a lifetime later. 

Lex had been sent away by then, not long after a falling out with Clark. 

Her somber cousin never talked about it, and Kara didn't have the heart to ask. She only knew that he'd gone to boarding school - to some fancy place that rich kids went.

It made it easier on Clark not to see him around. He'd made friends with Jimmy and Lois then, and the three had moved to Metropolis for college. They'd never mentioned Lex again. 

Kara had always assumed that his sister had gone off to boarding school, too. 

She mulled over that fact as she took in the sight of Lena, her features blurry in the dim basement.

It was foggy and stifling, the smoke from cheap cigarettes and something much more pungent clouding the room. 

The music was low and just the thing that soothed Kara on overwhelming nights, but the company wasn't exactly her crowd. Kara wasn't sure why she'd been invited in the first place. They were mostly Alex and Lucy's friends, an odd mix of stoners, garage band wannabes and ROTC troublemakers that saw her as more of a group mascot than anything else. 

Kara didn't mind being there so much when she saw Lena, though. 

Her hair was longer than it was all those years ago, straight and sleek in a way that framed her jaw nicely. Kara watched her as she rolled her shadow-smudged eyes at a lanky boy that was clearly making a point of towering over her. He crowded her as he leaned against the wall, a smarmy look on his clean shaven face. 

Kara recognized him as Maxwell Lord. She hated him with a passion. He'd said terrible things about Alex when she turned him down in their junior year, and he had a reputation for being handsy. 

Sure enough, only a few moments had passed before he wrapped his fingers around Lena's wrist and tugged. Kara couldn't hear what he said, but the way Lena curled her lip at him told her that it wasn't good. 

As she watched the boy's grip tighten, Kara felt the familiar drop in her stomach, the thing that had propelled her forward and convinced her to hand Lena her plate when they were kids. She'd felt out of place then, too, but even then it hadn't been enough to keep her rooted to the floor very long. 

Kara huffed and quickly grabbed two wet bottles from one of the open coolers nearby. She trudged across the room toward the whispering pair, her shoulders squared.

"Sorry, I got lost on the way to the kitchen," she muttered in Lena's direction, hoping it sounded as though she'd been sent off to find drinks. 

Kara swallowed thickly when she got a confused look in response, until Lena's eyes widened in realization, and a grin spread on her face. 

"It's no problem, really. Max here kept me busy. It was nice talking to you, but…" she trailed off, gesturing to Kara, who took the hint and walked away for Lena to follow. 

As soon as they were out of earshot, Lena let out a sigh. 

"God, you're a lifesaver…was it that obvious that I wanted to throttle him?" she said with a laugh, her fingers wiping at her forehead dramatically. 

"Well - you just looked like you needed some help. Max is…kind of a creep." Kara shrugged and ditched her bottle as they headed to the kitchen, all nerves again. 

Lena hummed in agreement when they crossed the threshold, and she jumped onto a counter as if she owned the place, black boots knocking against the cupboards. 

"Asshole is more like it," she continued with a scoff. 

Kara giggled and shook her head, her hands digging into her pockets as she leaned against the refrigerator. 

"Thank you, really. I was close to kneeing him in the balls, but my mother wouldn't appreciate the 'hamper it would put on business dealings with his father'." Lena said it offhandedly, but it wasn't hard to imagine that she wasn't exaggerating - especially with what Kara knew.

She nodded solemnly, but before she could open her mouth to comment, Lena's eyes flashed with something like recollection pushing past the fog of beer.

"Wait…do I know you?" Lena asked, not unkindly. 

Kara shrugged, attempting to sound noncommittal. 

"Maybe. We've met before, but…that was a while ago. I'm Clark's cousin…Kara?" her voice lilted, and she wondered if she sounded too hopeful. 

Lena's eyes narrowed for a moment, and then the smile was back again, a faint quirk of her lips. 

"Clark…I haven't seen him in ages. I do remember you, though." Lena smiled, and left it at that. There was recognition in her eyes, and that was enough for Kara. 

They stood in silence for a few moments, though the languid music made it seem longer. 

Kara wracked her brain for something to say, something that would buy her more time with Lena. 

"Want some cake?" she asked, because it was the first think she could think of that didn't sound completely uncool - but it still made her feel silly, childish. 

Lena pressed her lips together to keep from smirking at her teasingly - it was obvious that Kara was nervous, but she was trying. There was no false bravado there, none of the desire to conquer a Luthor that she sometimes encountered when she was in town. 

"Sure," she answered breezily - and the laugh that followed was light, nothing like the sharp sound she'd aimed at Max. It made Kara's stomach flip.

Kara ducked her head and nodded, and her head disappeared into the fridge before she produced a large sheet cake. 

"Winn's mom bought a cake - don't tell him I said anything, he stuck it in here before anybody came over so they wouldn’t rib him for it. He said I could help myself, though, so…" Kara rambled as she pulled a cake knife from a drawer and paper plates from the pantry. She'd been there often enough when Alex's band gathered to practice that pulling drawers and cabinets was second nature.

"Here," she announced, sliding the slice of cake across the counter. Her lips quirked up and she tried not to meet Lena's gaze, the memory of their first meeting playing over in her head. 

It seemed weird, to mull over something so trivial years later - something the older girl had probably long since forgotten. 

"Thank you, Kara." Lena let out a meaningful sigh, and Kara couldn't help but look up. 

There was something in her eyes, something that made the hopeful part of Kara stir again. 

"No problem." 

They ate in relative silence, scattering comments about school and graduation between lulls, and Kara didn't try to scramble for anything else to fill the gaps again. It was nice, comfortable, and when her plate was empty, she didn't hesitate to slide another onto it with a grin. 

\---------

 

When they exchanged numbers at the end of the night, with the promise to talk again, Kara assumed it was just a formality. She definitely hadn't expected the text the following morning - but sure enough, Lena had kept her word. 

It started with an innocuous "This is Lena! :)", and quickly progressed into a day of back and forth chatter, like they were just old friends catching up. Texting evolved to phone calls, to blurry video chats over Skype. 

Kara was surprised to learn that Lena had been sent off to boarding school shortly after Lex was gone, only to be kicked out the summer before her freshman year. She'd attended a private school in Metropolis since then, at Lillian's insistence. 

They talked about everything, about their favorite bands and foods and books, where they would meet soon for a proper hangout. 

Lena's voice was strained the first time they talked about their families, curled up and solemn on the bed in Kara's room. They were both adopted, Kara knew that much from the talk around town - Lillian never let anyone forget how philanthropic she'd been to take in an orphaned child. 

Aside from an occasional slip on some half drunken nights, she never mentioned Lex or Lionel again. 

With every week, they wrung out every hour that they could, always dangerously close to making Lena miss one of her endless summer volunteer activities. 

Despite it all, when the school break drew to a close, Kara was still surprised by the invitation to the Luthors’ home. 

Lena's boarding school friends were scattered across the country - and the way she described them, they didn't sound like friends at all. The only one Lena seemed to like almost as much as she hated her was Veronica - and there was some history there that Kara didn't want to touch. 

So Lena had invited her to her graduation party, backtracking and insisting that she didn't have to come if she didn’t want to. 

There was no way Kara wouldn't show, and she made that much clear five times over, her voice bright over the phone.

It had been years since she'd been to the Luthors', so long that they’d moved to a different zip code. While the new mansion's style was more cavernous and grandiose, it was just as stifling. 

Kara wore her nicest dress, but it still earned her a disapproving purse of Lillian's lips when she was led in. Her memory flashed to Alex's ratty pair of Chucks, and she set her jaw as she crossed the threshold. 

Lena gave her an apologetic look, but Kara warded it off with a smile - she knew the night would be hard enough on her without the guilt.

It was obvious that she was already out of sorts. Her outfit alone said enough. 

Lena looked lost in the dress, a tight maroon number that her mother had undoubtedly picked out. It clung in places she clearly wasn't comfortable with, and the gaudy piece of jewelry around her neck seemed to weigh her down, an albatross that advertised the Luthors' wealth. 

Kara hated it on principle. 

As they were led into the dining room, she could see why Lena had been forced into it. 

It was an upscale dinner party, the dining table surrounded by Lillian's friends from the country club and other over the top activities. The atmosphere was nothing like the smoky party they'd lounged at months before, and it was clear that Lena didn't want to be there as she settled into her seat. 

The speech that came next was more like a coldly written resume. Lillian's smile was rehearsed and fake, and she stopped short of mentioning Lena's future plans. Instead, her voice grew wistful, and she just had to mention Lex's acceptance to Metropolis University, to emphasize how promising his future was. The guests surely would have thought that it was meant to frame both of her children as successes, but Kara knew better. She caught the mournful look in Lena's eyes.

When Lillian started in on her role in their upbringing, on how proud she was to have raised them to be such brilliant adults, Lena let out a scoff. It was a quiet little accidental sound, but Lillian had visibly tensed, and Lena looked poised to run. 

The speech ended shortly after, and Lillian excused herself to speak to the staff about their dinner. 

She took Lena with her. 

Kara drifted away with a flimsy excuse about the restroom, and she trailed after them, suddenly afraid. She remembered the grip on a small wrist all those years ago, the hiss of Lena's name and the thing she'd been unable to identify in her young age. 

She stopped when she heard voices, hushed and rushed and strained. 

"How dare you? After everything I've done for you - these are my peers, Lena. Some of the most influential people in this town, shareholders, political officials. How dare you disrespect me tonight, you insolent little-" 

"I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking - I didn't mean-" Lena sounded so scared, her voice was so small, and it took every ounce of control in Kara's body to stay rooted in her spot. She wouldn't make it worse for her. 

"I don't care, Lena. That is precisely the problem - you don't think." She paused, letting the insult sink in. "The damage is done. I expect you to sit there quietly for the rest of the evening. Don't you dare embarrass me again, or so help me…that scholarship doesn't pay your tuition in full, Lena. Remember that."

\---------

By the time the dishes were on the table, Lena's posture and presence had changed completely. Her shoulders hunched as she picked at her plate - until her mother shot a look at her, and the icy look drew her shoulders back. 

Kara hated it, hated the way Lillian pointedly glanced over when Lena was halfway through her meal. 

Lena set her fork down and grabbed the crystal water glass in one fluid motion, as if she'd done it millions of times before. 

Kara almost wanted to cry, the hot angry tears that she sometimes felt come on when she saw something wholly unfair happening. Like the time Vickie Donahue had broken off her friendship with Alex and left her a sobbing wreck the week before prom. 

Kara reached out underneath the table and curled her fingers around Lena's, the grip steady and warm. 

They retreated to Lena's room after that, and Kara set her jaw the moment the door shut. 

"She can't - how can she - the way she spoke to you…" Kara shook her head, her fingers curled into shaky fists. 

"Kara…" Lena sighed her name, resignation in her voice, as she wrapped herself around a pillow. 

"This was your day, Lena. It should've been about you, she should have-" Kara cut herself off, that familiar flare in her gut bursting, all heat and determination. 

Lena lifted a shoulder in a half-shrug - she was used to her mother's treatment and hadn't expected anything else. It was easier to avoid Lillian's anger than to face it head on.

She never told Kara that she'd tried to object a few times when she was younger, to confront her mother about it, but it had only earned her drawn out weeks of silence. It might have been manageable if she'd had Lex, but he was gone by then, and the isolation was unbearable. She'd never tried it again.

A beat of silence. Lena could see the gears in Kara's head turning. 

"You know…it's not that late. Target's probably still open…" Kara trailed off, a crooked grin plastered on her face. 

Lena seemed to consider why her best friend would want to gallivant around the store after the night they'd had. 

"Let's go get you a cake." 

There it was.

"You and that one track mind, Kara…" Lena smirked, but the haze that had settled over her started to clear a bit at the suggestion. 

"Okay. Okay, let's go," she agreed, a chuckle on her lips when Kara took her wrist and led them out, weaving around through the back to avoid being spotted. 

They took Lena's car and blazed down Main, windows open to let the wind ruin their hair, some mix CD blasting through the speakers. 

They waltzed into the bright red and white aisles, half an hour before closing. Kara sent Lena off to choose her favorite box of cupcakes while she mulled over their cake options. 

She snagged a tube of icing and a box of birthday candles while Lena wasn't looking, shoving them under the cake in their basket, the shoddy job gaining a laugh from her friend. 

Kara insisted that Lena close her eyes when they settled in the car. 

The icing was messy and stained her fingers, but the cake proudly read "Congratulations Lena!", the shaky uneven letters surrounded by as many candles Kara could fit on the surface. 

It wasn't Lena's birthday, but Kara would be damned if she didn't give her best friend at least one wish before she went away. 

She didn't mention the tears in Lena's eyes when they were finally open, and she didn't ask what she wished for when the candles were all blown out. 

They ate the cake straight out of the flimsy container, with plastic forks from the snack bar, moody music punctuating their conversation.

Kara let it wash over her, the warm content she drew from Lena's presence - it reminded her of that night at the graduation party, albeit more intimate. 

They ate until the cake was nearly gone - at least two thirds of it demolished thanks to a very enthusiastic Kara. 

Lena didn't complain when Kara dropped cake on her seat - or when she accidentally smeared the stray icing on her chin instead of wiping it off.

It stained blue and wouldn't wash out of Lena's skin for a full day and a half. 

It was perfect. 

\---------

National City was huge. 

Kara still had some difficulty navigating the sprawling buildings, even a year and a half into her time there. 

It had quickly become her home, though. She'd been tentative to leave the NCU dorms in the first few months, but Lena had coaxed her out in no time with dessert recommendations and promises of food. Kara was lucky to have her, grateful for Lena's patience and National City knowledge. By the time she wrapped up her first year of university, it was Kara that dragged her to Noonans every other day for sticky buns. 

She had two orders of said sticky buns haphazardly stacked onto cake and pizza boxes as she made her way up the stairs of their apartment building, an excited bounce in her step. 

It was a special day. This would be Lena's first birthday with Kara in proper celebrating distance, and she was determined to make sure her best friend would remember it.

Especially since she was the only one there to celebrate with her. 

Lena hadn't spoken to her brother in years. She wasn't ready to tell her why, so Kara couldn't be sure, but she had a feeling it had something to do with Lillian. 

Kara knew that nobody would call or send Lena a card - she'd told her as much when Kara sent a package during Lena's first year away at university. It had made her so angry, to see the hint of tears on her webcam, that familiar pit in her stomach dropping when her best friend was wronged.

She was going to fix that, though. It was her first year as Lena's roommate and best friend, and Kara wanted to make sure her special day mattered. She'd almost set up a huge surprise party, but Lena wasn't fond of big crowds. There was something about the manufactured going away party Lillian had arranged when she went off to university (and no doubt the ruined birthdays in her childhood) that left her terrified of them.

So Kara had her own plans. 

She'd stocked up on Lena's favorite chocolate cake and splurged on two large pizzas from the best place in town.

When Lena opened the door and spotted the pile of food in Kara's hands, the knot that had built in her chest the whole day seemed to melt. 

"My hero." 

\---------

They fell asleep after devouring the pizzas and giggling through four episodes of New Girl. 

Kara was the first to wake up, her arms wrapped firmly around Lena's middle and wedged behind her, against the sofa.

It wasn't the firs ttime she'd woken up beside her best friend, but with the murmur of the television and the light filtering in on her cheeks, she felt the weight of it then.

The affection for her friend that had blossomed and grown over the years, spreading through her without acknowledgment for long enough. 

It was always there, in their quiet exchanges and lingering touches, just out of reach when they pulled away too soon. 

Her arm tingled uner the weight of Lena's sleeping form, but she didn't dare move, careful not to wake Lena or break the spell that had fallen over her. 

She stirred a few minutes later, elbows cracking as she curled into a more comfortable position. 

"Hi." 

"Hey," Lena rasped, heavy and sleep drunk. She rubbed at her eyes, her heart pounding when she shifted, felt just how tangled their legs were. 

"Cake?" Kara whispered, though the sound left her mouth as more of a strangled squeak. 

Lena hummed, a laugh touching the edges of the sound. She shook her head, reached out, fingers curled around a strand of Kara's hair. 

"Maybe later," she replied, a lazy smirk on her face as she leaned into Kara's space. 

It was a long time coming. 

Kara saw it then in the rearview, the heavy looks and words and touches that had been returned all this time. Always just short - but neither of them was pulling away this time. 

The pause was there, an out that wasn't taken - a sound of relief from Lena's throat.

Her lips found Kara's in a languid kiss, the built up anxiety from two years of wondering melting between them. 

Lena chuckled when roaming fingers gripped at her hips, smirked at the whimpered sound of awe when her tongue slipped between Kara's lips. 

The cake could wait. 

Noonans' sticky buns were just as good the next day, microwaved and shared on the bed with coffee, on a twisted pile of sheets. 

Kara eventually ate two slices of forgotten birthday cake after lunch that afternoon, laughing around a mouthful at Lena's confession - that she hadn't really wished for anything with the candles. 

She'd already gotten her wish before she ever blew them out.

**Author's Note:**

> fun fact: i banned myself from listening to this album for a month because i kept starting sad fics that i couldn't finish. 
> 
> thanks for reading. as always, please leave comments if you can, they're very encouraging and sometimes convince me to post frustrating works even if i'm not happy with them.


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